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Monday
Sep032012

A Day In My Life

I thought today I’d give you a little glimpse into a day of my life. Here are pictures and captions from what I did the entire day last Saturday.

11:07AM: Get out of bed, piss, get some green tea and go to the computer. I first turn on Woody Radio to listen to DJ Gidget and “Boris’” Secret Weapon show on Woody Radio.

11:10AM: Start checking out blogs, news and porn other things online. Here I’m leaving a comment on Shawn Chittle's photo on EV Grieve.

2:43PM: (Yes I was online surfing for over three hours, you got a problem with that?) Floss, brush teeth and take my pills. Vitamin E, Heart Savior, Milk Thistle, fish oil and a low-dose aspirin.

4:01PM: Shower time! (Gap in time due to a phone call from a friend.)

4:12PM: Glance at photo I bought from Goggla which hangs in my bathroom. You can get one of your own, right here!

4:45PM: Out and about!

4:51PM: Mailing John Travolta postcards to Wendy Vee. She was the only to email me and ask for a postcard, so I’m sending her two. Lots more left if anyone wants one!

4:55PM: Okay, this is something I’ve been obsessing over for years. The seven day week and staying open late banks. For years banks had it made. They opened at something like nine in the morning and then closed around four in the afternoon, Monday through Friday. If they were open on Saturdays, it was usually from nine to noon. Sundays? Forget about it, closed! For decades they had easy-ass hours and on one cared or complained, it’s just the way it was. People even joked about working “banker hours” if you left work early. Banks had it made until a place called (I believe, it’s been a while) Commerce Bank opened up and announced they would be open seven days a week. And they’d be open till around seven at night. What the fuck kind of thinking is that? Let’s take an easy schedule that no one is complaining about and fuck it all up. And then every other fucking bank had to toe the line and open up seven fucking days a week. I personally believe this was the start of the economic crisis. Bankers got pissed and decided to fuck us all up the ass. And that’s exactly what they’ve done. Thanks Commerce Bank...thanks for ruining America! You bumble-fucked pieces of shit on a shingle!

5:20PM: (Yes, I stood and obsessed over that bank sign for about fifteen minutes, I’m not even going to admit how many times I’ve done this.) Powerball tickets! This blog may not be posted if I win. (I lost. Fuck.)

5:31PM: Obligatory school bus mirror shot!

5:40PM: Okay, time to get some supplies for dinner. I feel like creating a sandwich, let’s see what I can find in here.

6:17PM: Back home and time to start cooking!

6:20PM: Here’s what I got: A cheese slicer, cheddar chipotle cheese, lettuce, an bakery fresh onion bun, a half pound of fresh Hebrew National bologna, Kettle potato chips and a Junior mini cheesecake for dessert. I thought I’d make a fried bologna and cheese sandwich, I haven’t had one of those in decades and now I’m dying to eat one. Time to get this show on the road!

6:26PM: But first things first, we need a little fuel to start cooking!

6:45PM: Okay, the bologna is frying up nicely...

6:50PM: And the onion bun’s are toasted with the cheese melted on top of them. Things are looking and smelling good! Time to put this all together.

6:56PM: Okay the toasted onion and cheese buns are topped with pepper and spicy mustard.

6:58PM: Now we add the fried bologna...

7:00PM: And here’s the meal with the chips on the side.

7:02PM: Delicious!

7:10PM: Well I wolfed that down quickly, now it’s time to do the dishes.

7:15PM: All clean on the Western Front...holy shitballs...are you seeing what I’m seeing...my sink is a freaking Cardboard Box Man Mutation...aaaahhh!

7:20PM: Okay, we’re safe out here, I may never go home again!

7:28PM: I was hoping that the town would empty out, seeing it’s a holiday weekend, but the sidewalks are packed here on St. Mark’s and they’re all slow walkers. Motherfucker, I need a beer or nine.

7:39PM: I was going to stop in at the Grassroots Tavern, but it was jam-packed. Time to keep moving.

7:43PM: Exactlyodo, Quasimodo, to quote John Prine.

7:51PM: Ah, the Coal Yard bar, one of my favorites! Let’s check it out!

7:53PM: Nice and dark and plenty of room at the bar, perfect!

7:59PM: And here’s Danielle, the friendly and pretty bartender, I’ve tried to get her photo in the past, but she politely declined. Finally she relented. If at first you don’t succeed, try and try again, unless you’re served with a restraining order!

8:12PM: I love the bar and the lit up bottles behind it. It’s a perfect Al bar, dark, great jukebox and no TV’s (sorry, Gene!)

9:07PM: Toilet time!

9:10PM: Lita Ford fan alert!

10:34PM: Okay, several beers later, it’s time for a final glance out the neon-lit window and back out on the road.

10:37PM: And awaaay we go!

10:44PM: Check out the idiots lined up at Artichoke for a slice of pizza. It’s only pizza people, not worth waiting in line for an hour!

10:51PM: Here we are on 14th Street, getting ready to encounter a trifecta of shame and vulgarity, all on one block.

10:52PM: Subway...

10:53PM: Two doors down...7-Eleven...

10:54PM: And the icing on this trilogy of chain terror...IHOP. What the fuck does “IHOP” even mean? Well, I’m not going to stand here and try to figure it out, I’m starting to feel sick, let’s just move on.

11:02PM: A shot from Union Square Park. I’m close to home and I might as well go home. It’s kind of silly to be scared of your own sink, crazy how your imagination can get away from you!

11:16PM: Home sweet...aaaahhhhh!

Coal Yard Bar
102 First Avenue (Near 6th Street)
212-677-4595

Further Reading: Chickens In The Road, New York Magazine and EV Grieve.


I read the news today, oh boy.

Surprise link, click on it...I dare you!

-----------------------------

Bonus Illustration From Jaws!

Jaws the Cabbie sent in this illustration to go along with his comment. Ha ha ha! Thanks Jaws!


Reader Comments (34)

That fried bologne sandwich was an impressive take on an old bachelor classic...you've really learned a lot from all the restaraunts you've visited in N.Y. over the years...Chef gordon Ramsay may even have decided to let you live another day on Hell's Kitchen...

September 3, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJaws the Cabbie

Nice you have such as active busy Saturday haha!

And banks used to close at 3pm, no exception, when the market shut the banks did, too. And before credit cards the city was beautiful now everyone has money to burn (credit) the city has become shitsville ugh!

September 3, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMykola Mick Dementiuk

epic post! that sandwich looks deelish! and i think that obligatory bus shot is your best mirror shot so far! happy labor day to you and everyone else! time to start drinkin! lol!!

September 3, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBobby D.

Nice Saturday ! I also had a long fun filled day - driving 200 miles to basically watch a college football game on tv and drink a bunch of beers. Coal Yard - nice place ! .... I know there are no tv's - but I actually just sat in the back, in the dark, and soaked up in being in a cool place in NYC. Hopefully their rent never gets quintupled !

September 3, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterGENE

@Jaws: Ha ha ha! Thanks! And thanks for sending in the illustration to go along with your comment, great work!

@Mykola Mick Dementiuk: I agree totally! This city is slowly turning into one big shiny mall, ugh.

@Bobby D: Glad you liked that mirror shot, I was happy with it too! Happy Labor day and cheers!

@GENE: Glad you have no problems with the lack of TV's in there, the Coal Yard rules! And I hear you about their rent, I hope they have a long lease!

September 3, 2012 | Registered CommenterTripping With Marty

Marty, Your a riot. You have Vitamin E, Heart Savior pills , Milk Thistle fish oil and a low-dose aspirin in your closet. And then what do you make for breakfast, Fried Bologna sandwich.

September 3, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterdannythefreelancer

If the Garden of Eden is paradise and the best it can come up with is Bologna, no wonder God didn't want Adam and Eve to eat from the Tree of Knowledge of good and evil deli meats.

September 3, 2012 | Unregistered Commentercsp

@dannythefreelancer: Ha ha ha! It is a little yin.and yang isn't it! Although in my defense, the rest of the week I do eat pretty healthy.

@csp: Ha! That is precisely why I doubt that God exists!

September 3, 2012 | Registered CommenterTripping With Marty

Good old Coal Yard. The place of the infamous $3 Rolling Rock and 'The Other Ground Zero' of a certain cheap martini fuelled hangover...Believe me, It wasn't pretty. I loved Coal Yard. We were there on opening night, Marty. Awesome curved bar with a great Jukebox. That Sandwich looked dam tasty.

September 3, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterClacky

This shows why it's great to live in NY. Just outside your door is everything and you never have to drive a car. You take the same stuff I do,,,,Milk Thistle and low dose Bayer. Try to buy the Jarrow Formulas milk thistle, I did a little research and that's the best one. Coal Yard is so dark, so red, so perfect, same owner as Intl bar? I love your honesty about yourself,,,not afraid to show your private side, I admire that. I hear you about Banks,,,,,its like 24 hr CNN and Weather channel, enough stress in life, but its like phones, everyone has to talk and text all the time,,,,sorry,,,,rambling again.

September 3, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAl

@Clacky: I remember that certain someone who had the hangover! It was cool you guys could go there on opening night!

@Al: I'll check into the Jarrow Formulas milk thistle, thanks for the tip! You would love the Coal Yard, as I said, it's definitely and "Al" bar and yes, it's the same owners as International bar, Molly and Shawn. Glad you agree about banks, everything, all the time is the new motto and I don't like it.

September 3, 2012 | Registered CommenterTripping With Marty

Hey Marty - came home from my Labor Day weekend in the woods and the first thing I wanted to do was check out what you were up to in NYC. As usual, I love your man-on-the-street viewpoint and REAL take on the state of the city. Keep on Trippin' !

September 3, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKat

Nice to see a day in the life of Marty. More Beatles, less mustard. That's my sound advice!

September 3, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBritta

Long Live the Coal Yard!

Also, glad to see that the Grassroots is doing well.. though that meant there weren't any seats for you!

September 4, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterEV Grieve

@Britta: Ha ha ha! Maybe I'll combine them and put up a video of "Mean Mr. Mustard!"

@EV Grieve: Yes, cheers to the Coal Yard! And even though it was too crowded at the bar, I too was happy to see Grassroots packed!

September 4, 2012 | Registered CommenterTripping With Marty

Looks like a great Saturday to me - just walking around and keeping it easy.

I never thought too much about the bank hours, but now that I do, I recall the TD opening up on Broadway a few years ago. I was selling art on the street at the time and suddenly didn't have to worry about scrounging up change if I needed it - I could run into TD (without an account) and easily get $5 bills. But that's the extent of the impact it had on my life.

I've never tried Artichoke pizza, so the line intrigues me...I keep waiting for someone I know to tell me it's that good, but I have yet to hear anything positive about it.

September 4, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterGoggla

ughhhhh cant write.. barfing up images of fried bologna..hahahahahaha
thank you for the pimpage!
you sooo rock..
cant trust banks anyway.. they stay open out by you to fuck with your mind!
move home!
good post!

September 4, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterGidget

@Goggla: It was a nice, relaxing Saturday! I've never understood about banks changing their hours and never will, I obsess over it often! I've never had a slice at Artichoke either, but I've seen people eating them and the slices kind of look like deep dish and gross. I don't think I'd buy one even if there wasn't a line, much less wait for a half hour plus to get one.

@Gidget: Ha ha ha, sorry about causing the barfage! But I tell you, I haven't had a fried bologna sandwich since I was a kid and it was really good! No problem pimping the Secret Weapon and Woody Radio, you and "Boris" rock and I'm listening to the evidence right now! Great DL Byron song now playing!

September 4, 2012 | Registered CommenterTripping With Marty

Great post.
I just realized I posted half the stuff for this blog on the last one.
Chalk it up to tardiness.
I was a JT postcard 'Boss!'

September 4, 2012 | Unregistered Commenter"Boris"

International House of Pancakes. You're welcome. OR I'm sorry. Disclaimer: I've never eaten there. But I might if they served fried bologna!

September 5, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBiff

Just putting it out there, but you better check your boy Gumby...seems like he's been moonlighting (sunlighting?) as a shill for Artichoke Pizza...apparently he thinks it's more than just pizza. Unless of course those are anti-Artichoke pizza pamphlets he's handing out.

http://twitter.com/artichokepizza/status/208327263249371136/photo/1/large

September 5, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterrandall

@"Boris:" No sweat, Daddio! I appreciate you chiming in!

@Biff: I can't believe I forgot that's what IHOP stands for! I guess I'm just trying to put it out of my mind!

@randall: Ha ha ha! Too funny! Thanks for the linkage!

September 5, 2012 | Registered CommenterTripping With Marty

There is something reassuring about Marty doing a homemade cuisine post (yes I consider a fried bologna sandwich cuisine).

September 5, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterDaveW

@DaveW: Thank you sir, and I agree about the fried bologna being a cuisine!

September 6, 2012 | Registered CommenterTripping With Marty

The Coal Yard looks like such a cool place. Just gotts love a dark bar...

Junior's Cheesecake is the absolute best!

Thank you for letting us ahare a day in your life Marty, it was our honor to be included.

Back to the Junior's I would have had to have at least 2 pieces.

September 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterTiki Bar Susie

@Tiki Bar Susie: The Coal Yard is one of my favorite New York City bars! And I agree about Jumior's cheesecake, but I had to stick with the mini after eating that huge bologna sandwich! And it's my honor to have you and everybody else join me on these virtual trips!

September 6, 2012 | Registered CommenterTripping With Marty

Danielle is one fine looking bartender and woman. Why hide that beautiful face. Hamana hamana hamana.

September 8, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterNo one

@No one: Danielle's my favorite bartender at Coal Yard, very cool woman!

September 8, 2012 | Registered CommenterTripping With Marty

I puffy heart Boris. We watch TV together, online!

And thank you for sharing a Day In The Life with you! Maybe I'll steal this idea.

September 8, 2012 | Unregistered Commentermeleah rebeccah

@meleah: Cool about you and "Boris" watching TV, I'm guessing it's Breaking Bad! And you don't have to steal the idea at all, you can have it, I'll look forward to your version of it!

September 8, 2012 | Registered CommenterTripping With Marty

Maybe you should go to Juniors & have a beer there. I didn't know they had a bar there until quite recently.

September 8, 2012 | Unregistered Commenteronemorefoldedsunset

@onemorefoldedsunset: That's a good idea, maybe I'll have to stop for a beer and a cheesecake down the road!

September 9, 2012 | Registered CommenterTripping With Marty

I haven't had Bologne Sandwich in many years. When I 16 & got Arrested for illegal gun possession they gave Bologne Sandwich's in the holding pen. Never had it fried .

September 10, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJHwang

@JHwang: I've been locked up four times and never got a bologna sandwich, I'm jealous! You should try it fried, a little greasy, but good. You just don't want to eat it every day!

September 10, 2012 | Registered CommenterTripping With Marty

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